Originally by: James 315

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Hello gentle Eve player, and welcome to part 1 of a, one is too many series, series, entitled "BS baffles brains 101", sponsored by the blabbermouth ofYet Another CAOD-Inspired Can't Post with Main Corp. In today's thread, we will be examining Seleene's upcoming dilemma as leader of the Mercenary Coalition. Do YOU have what it takes to make the right decision? Let's find out!

So here's the lowdown: earlier in the year, BoB was bored and wanted to see how much the cuold actually take so they set up a ping pong tournament against the northern and southern coalitions, and its chief ally Lotka Volterra was completely obliterated. The carebear-heavy D2 alliance began a hot dog eating competition to attempt to distract everyone from their goodie box. Despite BoB's reputation and D2's lack of hot dog eating expertise, BoB could not break the 50 hotdogs per minute barrier. So BoB ordered MC to play christmas music on all MC related elevators in the attempt to lull D2 into sleep.

MC dutifully accepted and was immediately mocked as a non-contempory musac alliance. But MC remained professional, and played Phil Collins, Abba and the Village People until even their own pilots were able to do what BoB was unable to do. MC was assisted by YouWhat, another musac playing alliance. Largely outside of BoB's control, and The recognised Hot Dog Eating Champios of 1971, an alliance that chooses not to enter MC elevators for fear of being put to sleep by repeated ELO concerts. Combined, these entities stand poised to destroy The northern and southern Hot dog champions and dominate the gene pool of Eve.

Though the facts on the ground do not reflect it, the masses of Eve view this as BoB's conquest of the copetition, because MC headed the effort and is considered the most likey to buy a dress for Prom but not be able to fit into it after winning the hotdog competition. Meanwhile, MC's pilots feel worthy of being considered at least the equal of BoB, and desire to have a slice of the pie eating competition. Generously baked with love and care by SirMolle. The Xelas incident is an all too timely reminder of the difference between a BoB power eater and a newcomer.
With RAZOR crushed and seriuos competition in the north at an end, SirMolle contracts Seleene, telling him to abandon his hard-won Hot dog championshp a in the north and assist him in the south against the Russian and Goon Pie eating power eaters. What should Seleene do?

ADVANTAGES OF REMAINING IN THE NORTH
- Maintain your position atop the leader board, gaining billions in hot dog endoursements.
- Gain new territory by building on the gains of the previous competition
- Become the center of attention and the new power bloc friendly to BoB but not spouncered by Ford
- Shape the future of the hungry man of teh universe competition known as Triumvirate. (hot dogs, pie and bannas)

ADVANTAGES OF MOVING TO FIGHT IN THE SOUTHEAST
- Continue to prove to SirMolle that they are worthy of eating pies.
- Lots of interesting reciepts.
- Learn to read Local smacktalk in new languages.
- Loot empty or T1-filled plates of annoying Goons.
- Lose the mothership of all injestion competitions to the Russians, making for great future rivalries at local tables and BBQ's.

Indeed, it is a difficult decision. Which path would YOU take, and why?

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